Being & Becoming

Cultivating Inspiration, Creativity, and a Life on Purpose

Remembering to Breathe

11 Comments

One of the most difficult parts of my transition to Parisian life has been not being able to physically practice yoga asanas (poses). This is no fault of Paris; there are many yoga studios all throughout the city. The issue is with me; a few weeks before leaving, I underwent surgery to remove a dislocated bone in my thumb that was beginning to hamper my practice. I was under the impression that it would be a very minor procedure, and that I’d be back on my mat in two weeks. This was not the case. For the first few weeks, my thumb was completely immobilized and my left hand was mostly useless. This made getting dressed a challenge, let alone facilitating a complicated international move. Just before leaving, my surgeon removed my cast, and his team helped mold me a more functional plastic splint.

Cast on the left, splint on the right.

Cast on the left, splint on the right.

Once in France, I had to guard my newly-armored hand on the metro, and still struggled to go about daily tasks (imagine trying to wrestle a pair of skinny jeans over long underwear and tall socks single-handedly-it is an arduous process). Every gentle bump to my hand was painful. In short, it really sucked.

In this time of transition, I longed for the comforts of a yoga studio: the glow of candles, flowing through sun-salutations with others, hearing sanskrit words, and the feeling of oneness when everyone in the room chants “om” together. Yoga is everywhere; one metro stop in nearly any direction leads one to a class. The expression “Water, water, everywhere, but not a drop to drink” accurately describes what I felt. I was distracted from this much of the time by the new places and people we encountered everyday, but whenever I slowed down, I felt the sense of longing again. 


The weekend before I left, my good friend Maura invited me to come to a meditation class she was holding. It left me feeling calmer, and helped me sort through the noise my mind was creating. I also recalled how meditating by focusing on candles the night before my surgery prevented me from panicking   About a week and a half into my stay, I remembered this feeling, and decided I wanted to feel it again.

My meditation set-up the night before my surgery.

My meditation set-up the night before my surgery.

I found a comfortable seat and closed my eyes. I felt my stomach rise and fall with each breath. I watched my uncertain, angry, guilty, and fearful thoughts flow in rapid succession, but did not try to stop them, nor focus on them. I let go. I let the thoughts exist, and simply observed, as if they were people strolling by while I sat in a café gazing out into the street. They came, and they went, and I was still here. After a few minutes, I opened my eyes, and felt less fidgety and anxious. My mind felt clearer. My heart felt a little more free. I recognized that the yoga studios would still be here in a few weeks, and I’d still remember how to do a down dog. Most importantly, I reconnected with what I’ve always shared with students; that as long as one can breathe, one can practice and receive the benefits of yoga.  I just needed a little reminder, too. 

Readers- I would love to hear how you meditate.  I would love to hear what experiences and activities bring you to a more meditative state.  What is your favorite way to work toward inner peace? 

11 thoughts on “Remembering to Breathe

  1. gentle sun salutes – for a good rinse out of toxins – dont ever underestimate the power of svanasana
    http://finkling.com/2013/12/03/om-g-thom-yorke-and-i-do-yoga-together/

    • Thanks, Mrs Finkling! I’m just getting back to practicing and remembering how healing sun salutations can be. PS- I love the idea of Radiohead and yoga 🙂

      • Haha so do I – That song just resonates with me as I go though every achy motion of the salutes – thats all I can literally think of – when I’m NOT supposed to be thinking!!!

  2. every mindful breath
    every mindful step
    brings peace
    to myself
    and the world 🙂
    may you gently heal.

  3. Kirtan. I love chanting, its uplifting quality and the space it provides to clear the mind. I guess it works well for me because your mind has something to do, but it’s so repetitive that you can’t help falling into a meditative state 🙂 all the best for you in Paris, it’s such a lovely city!!

    • Thanks, Amber! Paris is wonderful- I’m hoping to find a place that has kirtan nights, but haven’t had any luck. Do you know of any places? I find making music is one of the quickest ways to become completely meditative and in the moment.

  4. I usually have to do some variation of physical activity before meditating: yoga, dance, and even strength training have induced meditative states for me. I think the bottom line is being able to do something that gets my respiration going beforehand, so I’m sitting down to meditate with flowing prana circuiting through my body rather than trying to sit with stagnant energy.

    • Jennifer, this is such an amazing point, and exactly what I was missing whilst healing from surgery in the first weeks. The practice of yoga in the body is designed to prepare the mind for meditation. Five Rhythms was actually the first yogic thing I did in Paris, and everything felt so much freer afterwards. As Gabrielle said, “the quickest way to still the mind is to move the body”. Hope everything is well in Jersey, and that your classes are taking off- someday, I would love to take one!

  5. Thanks Candace! I came across this entry today, and it provided a well-needed reminder. Between the holidays, wedding planning and something of a family crisis that my fiance is going through, things have been a little stressful lately. I need to get myself to a yoga class! …and find a meditation routine of my own. Namaste.

    • Thanks, Elizabeth, I’m glad you enjoyed it! I hope the stress eases up- remember, you have all the tools to meditate and recreate the calm a yoga class can create- you have such a strong practice! Miss you and our PJM yoga family- let me know if you want any yoga teacher/studio recommendations!

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